Student Exiting Walker Building Steals a Glance at Himself In Lobby Mirrors

By Malcolm Kelner

Multiple eyewitness sources confirm an Emerson student looked to the right to check himself out in the large-panel mirror when leaving the Walker Building on Tuesday afternoon. At around 1:49 PM after his 12:00 class, sophomore marketing major Tim LaMay was sighted turning his head to the right to observe his reflection for between two and three seconds after descending the steps, before making a quick adjustment to the front of his messy brown hair and averting his gaze back to the entrance to the building. Sources added he then looked to the left and slightly down to try to play it off like he was merely stretching out his neck to each side, but they all called bullshit on it and knew what he was up to all along.

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