By: Malcolm Kelner
An EmCeleb is extremely anxious for spring break to end and to get back to school for the remainder of the semester.
Junior VMA major Timmy Harrison, who sources confirm is viewed as a “celebrity” among the Emerson community, is reportedly sitting around in complete irrelevance at his family’s home in Des Moines, Iowa, doing nothing but watching Netflix and staring wistfully at cornfields out the window.
“Only 79 and a half hours left until my flight leaves to Boston, but who’s counting?” Harrison said to Lion’s Tooth reporters, and then paused to reevaluate.
“I’m counting, because I haven’t gotten any attention for almost a week and I’m about to lose my mind.”
Sources added that despite being an absolute nobody in his hometown, Harrison has built himself up a cult following at Emerson due to his witty personality, social activism, participance in a plethora of extracurricular shows and clubs, and clever social media posts.
“I think I might post that skeleton meme with the caption, ‘Waiting to go back to Emerson like,’ Harrison gleefully chirped. “Or nah, I think I can do better.”
At press time, Harrison was submitting an Emerson Classifieds post about himself.