Report: First Date At Griddler’s Was An Awful Decision

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By Jeremy Vandroff

After a night gone terribly, terribly wrong,  VMA major Tristan Reynolds admitted taking a girl from his History of Jazz class out to Griddler’s on a first date was an awful decision.

“It seemed like a fun idea at the time,” mused the sophomore, staring blankly into the distance. After muttering what sounded like “jackass” to himself, he continued.

“I heard they were going to start accepting EC Cash, so I figured that might be a bonus too.”

Unfortunately for Reynolds, things got off to a rocky start.

“It went south fairly quickly,” reported Sean Alexander, 34, who was working the cash register at the time. Alexander went on to describe how Reynolds pathetically scurried around, asking customers how much longer they would be at their tables for.

“You can’t just walk in unannounced on a Saturday night and expect to get a table,” Alexander explained.

“This ain’t Bolocco, this is Griddler’s!”

The  disaster of an evening took another turn when Reynold’s EC Cash was declined. After laughing confusedly for a few minutes, his date covered the cost. She and Reynolds munched on waffle fries near the doorway for a while, and then Reynolds suggested they get a milkshake.

“She said she had homework,” Reynolds reported, and stared at an empty Griddler’s bag in his dorm room.

At press time, Reynolds date explained that while she absolutely loves the juicy burgers and friendly service at Griddler’s,  Reynolds was a “pretty weird guy,” and that’s why she got out of there so quickly.

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