Crestfallen Screenwriter, Not Nominated For An EVVY, Alone At “Hot Pursuit”

dejected

By Charlie Greenwald

Crushed junior Cal Vogt, who wasn’t nominated for an EVVY this year, was apparently the only person at the AMC Loews 6:15 showing of “Hot Pursuit,” the buddy comedy film starring Reese Witherspoon and Sofia Vergara.

“I need something to make me laugh and cheer me up, so I had to settle for this,” Vogt sighed. “It’s better than being at that stupid awards show, watching somebody else scoop up what should be MY AWARD!”

A Writing for Film and Television major, Vogt paid the required fee and submitted himself to the EVVY Awards selection committee, hoping to be nominated for penning the BFA film “Goblins and Dwarves.” Although Vogt claims his script “”would have made Ridley Scott weep,” the EVVY Awards opted to nominate other candidates, who also had submitted perfectly fine work.

“It’s bullshit, seriously,” Vogt howled while grabbing a slushie. “Whatever – this movie looks solid. Who doesn’t love a ragtag duo?”

Vogt was unfazed by the fact that he was alone in the theater, instead saying that the “peace and quiet” would do him some good.

At press time, the EVVY awards were also getting underway, with hundreds in attendance.

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