Emerson Steps Up Emergency Notification System With Andy Tiedemann Snapchats

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By: Malcolm Kelner

For the second time in as many weeks, Emerson has sent out mass “tests” of its Emergency Notification System, blasting out messages to every student through phone calls, texts, and e-mails to multiple addresses.

Students were fairly annoyed at the abundance of the messages before, but are now started to get creeped out after more tests of the system were sent out via video snaps from Andy Tiedemann on Snapchat.

“Hey guys, what’s up, it’s just Andy here,” Emerson’s Vice President for Communications and Marketing said in a soothing voice. “Just letting you know this is a TEST of our emergency notification system. Everything’s cool though, it’s just a TEST. Have a great weekend!”

The message triggered a major wave of confusion on campus.

“I have no idea how they got my username,” panicked junior marketing major Brad Nelson. “We get it, you’re testing the system. Leave me alone.”

While most students were extremely concerned over the invasion of privacy, not everyone was too upset.

“Andy’s actually pretty cute,” said senior communications disorders major Sarah Abernathy. “I had no problem getting the snap. The silver fox thing definitely works for him.”

At press time, Tiedemann was sending a follow-up snap of a selfie in a dark room with the Whisky Saigon geotag and the caption, “it’s lit.”

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