Guest Lecturer Totally Fucking Nailed Class Presentation

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With the determination of a lion hunting prey in the African Savanna, guest speaker Doug Arnolds laid down the law in Professor Stan Reynolds’ Marketing & Sales, Distribution and Service Relationships class this AM.

As the executive marketing representative of Boston Sports Club, Arnolds provided the class with a worldly, yet down to Earth view of the career field.

Arnolds opened his lecture with a request to have the projection screen put up so he could draw on the whiteboard. From that point on, Doug assaulted the class’ senses with his stories of “real world business dilemmas” and “marketing strategy lynchpins.”

Arnolds’ overt enthusiasm could be felt from all the way in the back of the classroom – where several students either slept or kept checking their phones every few minutes.

“I had those kids practically eating out of my hands,” he claimed. “I gave them the straight facts – none of that wordy textbook B.S. they’re used to.”

Though Arnolds felt his presentation was an undeniably “can’t-miss” source of key advice and inspiration, several students in the class felt otherwise.

“I wasn’t really paying attention. I was actually trying to finish my homework for my next class. I’m sure he was great or whatever,” remarked senior Kelley Walden.

Course Professor Reynolds caught up with Lion’s Tooth after the class ended, going on record to say, “I have no idea who that was. I just asked the department head to send someone in so I could catch up on grading papers.”

Arnolds ended his unforgettable appearance by writing his personal email on the white board with a nearly dried out green expo-marker, proclaiming, “I’m Doug Arnolds and never sell yourself short.”

At press time, Arnolds was seen chain smoking and handing out business cards to whoever walked by outside of the Ansin building.

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