Orientation Leader Duped By Freshman Who Was Actually Sophomore With No Friends


Spotting him from across the back room of the dining hall, Orientation Leader Jenny Macawitz was quick to hop on the chance to befriend a first semester freshman this afternoon.

To her dismay, the student was actually 20-year-old Marcus Rinne, who, despite being enrolled at Emerson College for an entire year and a half, has no friends.

The sophomore Visual Media Arts major, who was displaced from his usual lonely corner in the hidden nook of the dining hall, was presumably shocked from Macawitz’s attention.

“I had no idea what was happening,” said Rinne. “I was just eating a slice of DH pizza and next thing I know she’s asking me my major and a bunch of other stuff.”

The moment the OL realized her false presumption, she swiftly moved back to where she came from.

“I made a severe miscalculation,” Macawitz stated.

At press time, the friendless loser nerd reportedly let out a big sigh and reminisced to his first semester when he sat next to Jenny in Intro to College Writing class.

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