Report: Sorority Members Upset Facebook Didn’t Add A “Stop” Button To Use On Sisters’ Profile Pictures

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By: Malcolm Kelner

Emerson’s sorority sisters are reportedly very upset Facebook’s groundbreaking expansion of the “like” button today did not include a “stop” reaction.

This morning, users of the social media site around the world were given the new reaction options, “love,” “haha,” “wow,” “sad,” and “angry,” but much to the dismay of sorority sisters, “stop” was somehow left out.

“Definitely a buzzkill,” said Kappa member Beatrice Robertson, who, along with her other sisters, will have no choice but to continue typing out, “Oh my god stop you’re too perfect” on each other’s profile pictures instead of having the convenience of communicating the same idea with one simple button.

While the different sororities at Emerson have not always gotten along on the best terms, they could not have been more united on this issue.

“I don’t know how [Facebook CEO Mark] Zuckerberg could have left out a ‘stop’ reaction,” echoed Katie White, a sophomore sister from AEPhi. “‘Like,’ ‘love,’ and ‘wow’ are pretty much interchangeable but ‘stop’ would have been actually different, and crucial in our skin-deep validating procedures”

“Such a shame.”

As if the day could get any worse, follow-up reports indicate the sisters were also lamenting the absence of an “I Can’t Even” button.

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