Parents Weekend Makes Allston Party Totally Awkward

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Ah, parents weekend. A time both anticipated and dreaded by college students across the nation. The promise of free food, spending money, and quality time with loved ones mixes with the constant fear of parental embarrassment and the fact that your Dad might finally realize that you’ve actually been buying beer with the money he gave you for schoolbooks creates an atmosphere unlike any other.

Unfortunately, this can sometimes lead to some awkward scenarios, like the one on Friday night where the Lacrosse team’s Allston “Parents Freek-end” party was “totally weird,” due to the excessive amount of adults in their 50’s in attendance 

“The whole night was just really uncomfortable,” Junior Emma Flanders said, “all the parents kept trying to get their kids to pose for photos and they kept requesting “Beat it” and “The Electric Slide” from the DJ.”

Other student accounts are similar with reports of terrible dancing, shocked expressions, lots and lots of brandy in flasks, and the constant inability to understand youth culture.

“I go to parties to try and meet girls,” said sophomore Jake Blankman as his mother attempted to clean a bit of dirt off his face, “but my mom and dad kept scaring everyone off when they said every girl I talked to would make a nice wife. I don’t know why I thought bringing them would be a good idea.”

No other partygoers were available for comment as they were all reportedly being dragged down the freedom trail against their will.

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