STUDY: 86% of School’s Creativity Used On Library Desk Graffiti

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New research results are suggesting that 86% of the creativity found in Emerson College is used towards graffiti on the desks of the Iwasaki Library.

“We conducted this study over the course of the last seven semesters and found that over four fifths of the creative firepower found across Emerson’s Boston campus, ECLA, and Kasteel Well was being poured straight into doodles found atop the desks on the third floor of the Walker Building,” said Craig Bolz of The Lourie-Quinn Research Consultancy. “Most of these works are cartoon depictions of various fictitious scenarios. Some are actually fragmented sentences that reference subjects ranging from procrastination to ‘zombie proms’-whatever that means.”

The remaining 14% of remaining creative juices were categorized in a section labeled ‘Other’, which includes all films, papers, poems, essays, shows, performances, books, articles, showcases, layouts, scripts, rundowns, designs, programs, ideas, and strategies that were hatched from the minds of Emerson students.

A press time, researchers were going back to crunch the numbers a second time upon realizing they forgot to account for the depictions of male genitalia on the walls of the restrooms of the Ansin Building.

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