According to sources the 2017 Commencement speaker had some “choice words” that a reputable publication like this one has the sense not to print. But fear not! Emerson College had a plan to make sure no scandal would erupt from 2017’s choice of words. Agent J popped out with the memory wiper and implanted memories of Jay Leno coming back as the commencement speaker. The audience was reported as “sleepy and confused, but otherwise, no worse for wear,” by the clean up crew. This is the fourth year that the Jay Lenno Speech has been reused, despite the fact it was delivered only three years ago, that’s how good this school is. If you asked anyone high lights from last year’s speech, they’d just start listing his rules for show business. More on this as it develops… wait there was a flash, what was I writing about?